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After all this time, a Carnival post. German version to follow. Anyhow, seeing the April 2014 carnival is about comparing ace experience to other experiences, I remembered some interesting quotes from something I proofread for a friend:

„If a psychologist runs into a person they cannot squeeze into the definition of normal, they either resort to psychobabble or pick out a good disorder. “

„Psychology views (…)s as part of the “lunatic fringe” because the studies they use to base their worldview of “normal” upon rely upon what the majority does– […] This is more than simple rarity; it saying that what the […] do should be the definition of normal and is a proper measuring stick by which mental soundness should be judged.“

„(…)s are unique and rare–just like {…}. Rarity can be taken for disease, though this is a logical fallacy.“

„(…)s themselves feel like there must be something wrong with them because they don’t behave the way they “should,” i.e. the way the majority behaves. Thus they are more open to accepting others’ opinions of their shortcomings, reasonable or not.“

„Lack of societal acceptance may actually contribute to real mental problems which are not intrinsic to the (…)’s mental make up, but spring from a lifetime of ill treatment at the hands of others.“

All those quotes about (…)s – who are, in this case, INTP Myers-Briggs types – were written by Anna Moss, an INTP friend of mine from Alaska. They’re excerpts from „The Secret Life of INTPs“. She’s selling the e-book from her website.

Anyhow – I don’t know whether I can draw an analogy. Plenty of minority groups share the feeling that they are, somehow, wrong.

It just struck me as interesting that this experience is also shared by certain personality types. I’m a self-diagnosed INTJ with INFP tendencies. Meaning, simply put: I’m an introvert more interested in theories and big pictures than in details and day-to-day happenings, who somewhat prefers using logic when making decisions, and usually needs a bit of time to mentally adjust to changes of plans.

Things this leads to: I sometimes see behavioral patterns when there aren’t any, leading to me being miffed without reason. I react strangely when asked to host a cocktail party on short notice, even though I’d actually like to. I utterly dislike household chores and tidying up.

I forget important stuff like buying food, or eating, because I’m distracted by something that’s happening in my brain. Being around big numbers of people exhausts me, so I need a lot of alone time. My preferred activities are reading and writing, followed, oddly enough, by dancing.

I have only a handful of friends – the more contacts I have to juggle, the more panicky I become. This is also the reason why I don’t have a tumblr. Sometimes I can’t for my life figure out appropriate responses and thus put my foot in my mouth. Sometimes I resent how patient I have to be and how I have to tone down my vocabulary when talking to customers in the pharmacy.

Apart from sex, I also don’t get how someone can willingly go out and socialize for several evenings in a row.

Anyhow. Obviously, this is not majority-worthy behavior. Or actually socially accepted behavior.

Sometimes I wonder whether my alienation to others is due to my asexuality, my introversion, the head-in-clouds IN leanings or the fact that I, for my life, can’t manage to be as sensitive as „normal women“ are supposed to be. Sometimes I wonder whether or not my personality and asexuality are aggravating each other.

But, meh. It’s not like I can actually change these things. Nothing will make me a talkative social butterfly who’s always up to date with the newest happenings.